REVIEW: Unknown Origin (1983)

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Unknown Origin: B
The guy who played Robocop is an 80’s Wall Street goon who is plagued by a giant rat (note: the rat’s actual size fluctuates between small dog to large rat) in his posh NY crib. This guy is such a pussy. He has so many opportunities to kill the fucking rat during this 80’s horror Roadrunner cartoon style B-movie, but, like a little white-collar bitch, he RUNS FROM THE RAT multiple times. There are escalating rat shenanigans that begin as minor annoyances and evolve into violent mayhem in which the viewer can’t help but be impressed by the rat’s problem solving skills.

The catharsis comes when he finally mans up and dons a leather vest with full catcher-gear and smashes his house up while hunting the rat. Wielding a spiked Louisville Slugger, our protagonist finally slays his enemy, who has taken refuge in the cellar (of course) in a to-scale model of the house. In a painfully transparent allegorical ending, Robocop smashes the model house and the rat to smithereens just in time to welcome his rotten white wife and kid home from vacation. Shannon Tweed’s first film.

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